White DE version 2

Monday, June 27, 2005

A Letter

Dear Mr. R. Kelly.

You's a crazy bitch. I am writing in reference to my recent viewing of your video 'Trapped in the Closet'. You need to learn some basic rhyming skills again. I notice that certain lines of you song are pretty stretched to rhyme - like 'window' and '5th floor' - those don't rhyme. I would go into more detail but I must get to work. I, unfortunately, do not get to publish my non-rhyming-only-makes-sense-to-me songs that I make up in the shower, unlike you.

Oh, I do have one more question. I noticed in the video tag at the end it says 'Trapped in the Closet, Chapter 1 of 5'. Please assure me that we are not to be subjected to another 4 songs such as this. Your fiction is amusing, but highly unbelievable. I mean, the woman in this video looks to be at least 25-30 years old and from what I can gather that is approximately 10-15 years older than your preference. I, therefore, have a hard time believing you would be trapped in her closet...under her little sister's bed, mayber...but not hers.

Thank You,
Matty McMattMatt

2 Comments:

Blogger Jay Six said...

I was in such a bad morning mood until I read this. Ah, The power of good blogging. I saw that video the other day, too and was confused as hell. You've put my confusion and frustration into words. You rock, Matty.

10:23 AM  
Blogger FB said...

I must be blessed. I've dodged this video and Jessica Simpsons' These Boots video.

Too funny. But sad when I think he makes money off of this crap.

12:56 PM  

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